Kyo, another character, and basically no plot
by HeadfirstForHalos412
Summary: This story is a warning to all readers: why you should never let crazy, 12 year old fangirls make up new characters. [ch3: time portal thing! now up]
1. KyoXOC

I wish to apologise in advance for this... it is my way of getting back the time I wasted starting to read crazy fanfics written by preteens who write themselves into the story... because you KNOW they've based the character on themselves!

I am very sorry, but this wouldn't stop nagging me until it was written. It was written during a drugs talk, on why we shouldn't sniff diesel. BAH! If happiness had a smell, it would smell like diesel.

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Disclaimer : I don't own Fruits Basket... blahblahblah (insert a failure of a witty remark)

**Hiyaz! This is my first fic, so read it pleez! I based the character on myself, to make the story more believable, and yes, I really am like that!**

**Pleez read and review because it is my bes fic I've ever written!**

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One day, Tohru and Kyou and Yuki were in class, and were all like, totally bored.

Then, the teacher brings some new girl into the classroom, and Kyo's like "OMFG, she is so THE SEX!"

Kyo falls in love with her, because she's like, all beautiful and stuff. She has long orange hair, like Kyo's, and she had deep dark, mysterious, sexy eyes, and she looked over at Kyo, and he started blushing and stuff. The girl was wearing clothes from Hot Topic and was totally cool, because she had like, massive boobs that bounced around a lot, and all the guys in the class liked her, but she only liked Kyo. She had transferred from America, but of course, she could speak Japanese totally well, because she was a genius and stuff and yeah.

The only free seat was beside Kyo, and she went and sat down in the seat and was like "Hey sexy!!" to Kyo, and he was all like, blushing. He stared at her a lot, and she liked it, because she totally liked Kyo, but she was being really cool and all, so she didn't say anything for a while, because that's what cool people do, you know. I'm cool too.

The girl was called Krystal. She winked at Kyo and he smiled at her. You could feel the love, and they wanted to have sex, very much.

Then, they went home, and Kyo invited her to Shigure's house because he loved her and wanted to do things with her. Then when they arrived, Shigure was all "Krystal will be staying here, because she is like, partly related to us, only so far away, it's not much related!" and Kyo was like "yay!" and Krystal was like, silent. Because silent is cool, and I'm really cool.

Krystal didn't have anywhere to sleep and then she went to sleep in Kyo's bed because it was the only one she could sleep in or something. She wore tiny PJs that clung to her super sexy body and made her look dead hot and stuff and all. Kyo looked at her and got a nosebleed and was like "Krystal, I love you!"

And then, Krystal was like "I love you too! I want your babies, even though I'm WAY underaged and I hardly know you!"

So then, Kyo sexed her up. He stuck his thing in her thing and they did this a lot until she was totally pregnant, and then she licked him a bit, and then they both fell asleep, because they were so happy and tired and stuff. When they woke up, Krystal had morning sickness, because every pregnant woman has morning sickness every morning while she is pregnant, even when she's only been pregnant for several hours. It's true!

Then, they went to the breakfast table, and Kyo was like "Hey peoples, I just want to say, me and Krystal sexed each other up last night, and she is totally pregnant!"

Everyone was so happy that they had had underaged sexy-time and that Krystal was pregnant, thus ruining her school life, and probably the rest of her entire life. But it wouldn't, because even heavily pregnant preteens can go to school.

Krystal had a big bump on her tummy because she was pregnant and went to school, and everyone was happy, and all her babies were born with orange hair and dark eyes. They had like, 10 babies at once, so they were all happy and stuff. And they all lived happily ever after.

ZOMG!!111! I finished my first story. Did you liek it? Pleeez review it and don't flame or I won't give you a cookie! If you give me a nice review I will give you a cookie! Yay! I love cookies!

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The moral of this story: NEVER, I mean NEVER let preteen fangirls, who want their favourite character's babies, write fics... it will all end 'happily ever after'... and we don't want that now, do we?

I hope I didn't break your brain too much... oh, and no offense meant to anyone really called Krystal (it was just one of the many over-used names I could have chosen from), or to American fangirls (many of you are super sexy people).

And I'm sorry, a grammar and spelling freak such as me just COULDN'T bring herself to type the hideous language that is fangirl english. I apologise.


	2. The new zodiac member

Okay, another chapter with another story. I must apologise in advance again. Also, to you emos out there. I am not making fun of you at all, I am simply making fun of the wanna-bes who abse a character as themselves and make them "emo".

Another thing, I am not saying anything is wrong with FOB or MCR. Two of my favourite bands ever, you know. Also, the song isn't called "car crash hearts" it's actually called "thriller" but the tiny people at my school call it that. So on with the show, bitches!

_This is for you, ArraMidnight_

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits basket, but I do own Krystal because she is my new character I made up and stuff**

**Hey! I got such good reviews that I decided to write another fic for you guys! This is also an original!

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Tohru and Kyo and Yuki were hangin' in thier crib, when suddenly Shigure brought a girl into the room.

"I want to introduce to you another member of the zodiac. She is the badger. Sorry I never mentioned her before, but it never really came up in conversation." Shigure said.

The girl was tall with black hair and a white stripe. She wore many belts hung around her waist, tight jeans and a tight top, and she looked well hot, like. She was totally emo, because emos are cool. So am I.

She had lived in America all of her life, because her parents didn't want her anywhere near the other zodiac members. However, of course, she spoke perfect Japanese.

"Hi, my name is Krystal." she said, all dark and mysterious, because that's what emos are. Dark and mysterious. Because that's cool, and I'm totally cool.

Later, she went intot he extra room, which had been there always, just never mentioned. She put up posters of Fall Out Boy and The Black Parade, and then she started listening to some music. She listened to Fall Out Boy's song called Car Crash Hearts.

_so long live the car crash hearts  
cry on the couch all the poets come to life  
fix me in 45  
so long live the car crash hearts  
cry on the couch all the poets come to life  
fix me in 45_

Haru heard music and watched her dancing really sexy like through her door. He thought she was very hot, and really emo. Haru fell in love with her, and realised he hated Rin because she is so mean and he could do better, and Krystal was much better.

Later that day, Krystal came down to get coffee, and she saw Haru. She looked at Haru, and she fell in love with him, but she didn't tell him anyway. Then, when she was getting the coffee, she dropped the kettle and got badly burnt and Haru rushed to her rescue like a really cool hero. When he had made sure he was alright he looked into her eyes and said "It's good you're okay. I love you. Marry me!"

Krystal started to cry, because she was so full of emotions. She had been so scared to tell Haru, and she was so glad that she said "I love you too Haru! Let's smex!"

Then her and Haru smexed each other good (on the kitchen floor), and then, the Sohma curse was finally broken because Krystal had been the long lost zodiac member and now that she had come back there was no more curse and stuff. So Krystal and Haru got married, and Rin wasn't invited because she is a bitch and everyone hates her, and they all lived happily ever after. Krystal cried a lot because she was so happy,and because she was totally emo.

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**Did you like it? I think I am improving my fics, and I even based Krystal on myself this time, because she will then be cooler this way. Pleez review, and I will give you a cookie pleez! No flames or you will make me cry tears of blood and pain and despair.

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Moral of this story: NEVER let a preteen weemo who is obsessed with the zodiac write fics... it'll all end in tears. Weemo tears!

Again I apologise. I just can't help myself.

I must credit ArraMidnight, who gave me the inspiration to continue this on to another chapter. Seriously, thank you.


	3. Time portal thing!

_Disclaimer: __Kyo-chan__: Krystal doesn't own __Furtuba__... boo __hoo__. You made me cry. Give me cookies!_

_Sorry for the late update. This chapter gives you a new twist to the story! Enjoy it and remember to review!!_

One day, two girls name Krystal and Sakura were in the mall, hanging out near Hot Topic. They wore tight skinny jeans and a tight black Fall Out Boy shirt, each had a different kind. There were many belts hanging from their waists and they were smoking, looking well hot. All of a sudden they were zoomed through a magical portal, bringing them to an alternate world.

They landed on their asses and got up to look around. Both were not scared at all, being emos. Emos are cool at all time. Like me and my friend Mistyriver. A boy with white and black hair came up to them and said "Hello, my name is Haru. Who are you?"

They told him about the alternate world, and as he looked deep into their purple eyes, he believed them. So he took them to Shigure's house, where they met Kyo. He immediately fell in love with Krystal when their eyes met, and forgot all about that bitch Tohru. She's always too happy, anyway.

They had to stay in Kyo's room, and they all slept over that night, including Haru, because he was in love with Sakura. They all had to share Kyo's bed, because it's better that way. Tohru lent them tight black pj's to sleep in, and they fell asleep quickly after such a busy day.

Haru and Kyo didn't because they loved them and they stayed up all night thinking. In the morning, they decided they would keep it a secret and never tell.

In the morning Yuki came downstairs andwas still half asleep and tripped and fell and hit his face. It started bleeding and Sakura pushed Tohru out of the way and went to help. She was very good, and mended it with bandages and stuff. Haru was so impressed with her, that he wished that it was him with a bleeding face.

A knock was on the door, and Krystal and Sakura answered it, because it was only manners in a strangers house. Outside was a man with black hair, green eyes and red eyeliner. "Hello, I am Frerard Gay, and I am a time portal monitor. You came through a time portal, didn't you? I have come to arrest you!"

Krystal and Sakura bowed and said "Konnichiwaa, frerard-chan! Dozo yorosheekoo demo masu dattebayo ohayo o kudasai ne ka desss?" because that is how you say Hello, how are you? In Japanese, and they knew Japanese. They learned in the time alternate world portal thing with swirly colours and stuff.

They were arrested and Kyo and Haru came to save them, fighting off all the guard with their kung pow skills and ninja tactics. They finally got them and kissed them and made them pregnant (yes, in the jail cells, on CCTV... that's well hardcore, like me and my friend.) and then they had babies and lived happily ever after in the alternate world because they were emo. Emos are cool. Like me.

**Ooo123ooOpagebreakwithasecretmessageshowinghowwiityipbviouslyamOoo123ooO**

_Konnichiwa __eyeryone-chan__! It has been a while since I updated, due to the fact that I was hanging around the mall every day and didn't find the time. GOMENASAIYANEOMATTEDEMODESUKANE! That means sorry, for all you who don't know Japanese (I do! I learnt it from Fruits Basket!) I dedicate this chapter to __my __bestest__ buddy __Mistyriver__, or as I sometimes call her Sakura, because that is a nice, anime name that I love. I hope you are reading this!! Please review and I will give you all cookies and love you forever. Flames will be used to bake more cookies with for the proper reviews. Not criticism please, I'm an __emo_

_I have work tomorrow. __Or rather, in 6 hours.__ It is 3:27 now... I'm sorry I didn't update in __yonks__... I forgot the password for the account! __(SHAME!__SHAME!)__I know, I know...__ I doubt anyone's missed this, though... it's hardly art, or interesting!_

_I dedicate this to the ultimate __Weemo__, Craig. __The inspiration for __weemo__ bashing in all of my __fics__ You __know__ I want you dead, and I know you're scared of me! Also, this is in memory of __Mistyriver__, who isn't actually dead yet, but that is __besides__ the point. You found it, __yay__! It's not as great as you thought, huh? _

_Thanks for the reviews and all, I feel flattered at all the attention, I really do!_


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